Change is good. The action itself doesn’t have to be dramatic, but could have life changing results. For example, a change in thought could help with your perspective and attitude about something going on in your life. “You are only one thought away from changing your life.” -Rita Schiano
When you are depressed you are living in the past,
When you are anxious you living in te future,
When you have peace you are living in the present.
If you make fat jokes about Adele, you’re being a dick, & im referring to you, Joan Rivers. Seth Macfarlane started it at the Oscars, but then after the Oscars, Joan Rivers tweeted, quote, ‘You could easily pick Adele’s statuette out of a line up because it was the only one wearing Spanx.’ Then, she went on The Letterman Show & made a whole bunch of awful jokes, & included her saying, ‘I’ve met Adele’, & then she went, [puffs face/body out].
How dare you make fun of one of the best female role models on the planet for the way she looks. Adele is one of the very few women in pop music that i want my daughter to look up to, & you’re making jokes about the way she looks, when you’re so insecure about your own face you’ve spent more money on it than the producers of Life of Pi spent on that tiger.
I’ve met Adele & she was lovely - & hot. You, Joan Rivers, have become a jaded, bitter old mole. Get a plastic surgeon to manufacture yourself a new soul. Stop being an enormous, hypocritical, insensitive DICK.”
There are some mornings where my love holds me so tight I feel we are connected… I know it’s true.
Is there a moment when you love a man and a moment when he wasn’t what you thought your love could be?
“If it’s true that we’re all from the center of a star, everything atom in each of us from the center of a star, then we’re all from the same thing, and even a coke machine or a cigarette butt on the street in Buffalo are made out of atoms that came from a star. They’ve all been recycled thousands of times as have you and I. So, if that is true, and I am everywhere in the universe, in an extended sense, and therefore, it’s only me out here, so what is there to be afraid of? What is there that needs solace-seeking? Nothing. There’s nothing to be afraid of, because it’s all us.”
- George Carlin
‘You block your dreams when you allow your fear to be bigger then your faith’ - Mary Manin Morrissey
Four words have struck me the hardest in this past week… Fear, Faith, Potential and LOVE… I have been on holidays this past week to refresh from the years events and craziness and it has been not so much a physically draining week but an absolute emotional and mental struggle.
Since moving out of my parents household and becoming an independent adult almost a year ago I know I have struggled massively with myself in every single way. Denial was fast becoming an everyday lull to numb my actual feelings and face up to certain factors in my life that were effecting me in every way. I started to drink more and more to the point were it was easier to count the days drunk then sober which was a very morbid feeling.
About five days ago, i bottomed out… which was just becoming an all too familiar feeling and i hated it, but even more i hated the person i was becoming or even worse may of become. The person i consider myself to be and want to be was not even visible in my eyes, even too the point i actually physically looked different in the mirror. Nearly a whole year of holistically abusing myself was taking its toll… The saddest part was i couldn’t even cry, i felt somber.
Fear. We all feel it and we are all scared of something, my fear is that i won’t accomplish anything i want to do in life or become a person that is not talented, loved and happy. It’s a double edged sword for me, i fear not becoming all i can be but i am so fearful i actually push myself away from who i want to be and self sabotage or become inwardly destructive. In my eyes i have been basically pushing and pulling myself in all directions except for the right one. I fear i am not good enough for another human beings love, I fear that i won’t have the right career for myself and I fear remaining constantly unaccomplished.
Faith. Everyone has some form of it, I respect and cherish every form. I went to my best friends wedding on Friday and the amount of Faith in that one day was absolutely overwhelming, I loved it. It got me thinking about my own faith and even believing in myself. I believe in inner peace, i believe in the universe, I believe in over peoples relationships with their gods. I think i became so overwhelmed because in my universe and in myself peace was missing, there was a huge gap spiritually that has been missing for a very long time. Having faith that i would be successful in all my endevours were some how devoured with fear and self doubt… I felt lost and out of touch with my spiritually and I think that was the most upsetting moment.
Potential. I always hated that word especially if people used it in the sentence of “She just isn’t reaching her true potential.” I would think “does anyone ever really reach their highest potential? Is that even possible?!” I think in my over thinking state, it is… Potential is a goal set by yourself yet i think peoples beliefs in what you can reach really harnesses that for you. I think that if science has taught us anything its that potential is infinite.
Love. My favourite thing in the world. Yet when it comes to loving myself why is it so difficult? I love my animals, my family, friends, hobbies, job… yet with the most important centre of that (myself) I find it impossible. There is always a physical imperfection or a personality flaw that i think is unfixable, why is it when it becomes about inner self that love is so hard to see… I don’t want to believe i am my own worst critic… Compliments are taken with a struggle and can’t understand why they would be given too me. Even with male relationships, a man could find me attractive, entertaining, fun to be around and yet i still have to fear that love and run for the hills… It is frustrating to say the least.
I think what i have realized in this past week is that fight in myself, it’s there except I’ve been using it in the wrong way. I’ve been harnessing that overwhelming fight power and using it to attack myself instead of the fears and inconsistencies in my life and not actually using it to attack my potential future and fears and come out swinging. I’m allowing myself this next 12hrs to still think and harness my plan of attack and after that, I’m getting back to myself…. I will love myself and change my perception of how I see the world, to view it with love and enthusiasm instead of fear and loss of self.
No matter how much potential we have holding on to the right things, by holding on to the wrong things, we take up vital space and give the illusion of limitations.